ashleel chherrkhani da shikar hon vale bahut sare lok haddo vadh sharmindgi mehsoos karde han atey apne aap nu doshi samajhde han. kairan di misal te gaur karo jo hun 19 saala di hai. jado oh 6 saala di si, odo os naal ashleel chherrkhani honi shuru hoi te 13 saala di umar tak os naal idda hi hunda reha. oh dassdi hai: “mainu apnia doshi bhavnava naal larrna painda si. mai sochdi si, ‘mai inne saal apne naal idda kyo hon ditta?’”

 je tusi vi idda hi mehsoos karde ho, taa heth dittiya galla te gaur karo:

•   bache sex karan layi na taa sareerak taur te atey na hi jazbati taur te tyaar hunde han. ohna nu sex da matlab nahi pata hunda jis karke oh is layi razi nahi ho sakde. is layi bachya naal hon vali ashleel chherrkhani layi oh zimmevar nahi hunde.

•   bache aksar vaddya te yakeen karde han atey oh ihna bure lokaa diya chaala to anjaan hunde han. is karke oh aasani naal ihna de shikar bann jande han. ik kitab dassdi hai: “bachya naal ashleel chherrkhani karan vale aadmi ‘thagg’ hunde han atey bache ohna diya chaala samne kujh vi nahi kar paunde.”

•   bache naal ashleel harkata karan karke os andar jinsi ichhava jaag sakdiya han. je tuhade naal idda hoya hai, taa is vich tuhada koi kasoor nahi hai. kyo? kyoki sadde sareer nu is tarha banaya gaya hai ki je is nu khaas tareeke naal chhohya jave, taa sadde vich eh ichhava jaag jandiya han. is da eh matlab nahi ki tusi apne naal keetiya jaan valiya galat harkata layi razi si ja is layi tuhanu doshi thehraya ja sakda hai.

 sujhaa: jis umar vich tuhade naal chherrkhani keeti gayi si, os umar de kise bache bare socho. apne aap to puchho: ‘je is bache naal ashleel chherrkhani keeti jave, taa kee is nu doshi thehrauna sahi hovega?

 kairan ne idda hi keeta jado oh tinn bachya di dekh-bhaal da kamm kardi si. ohna vicho ik bache di umar lagbhag chhe saal di si. ise umar vich kairan naal ashleel chherrkhani keeti gayi si. kairan dassdi hai: “mainu ehsas hoya ki is umar vich bacha kinna lachar hunda hai atey mai vi os same lachar si.”

 sachayi: tuhanu apni havas da shikar banaun vala hi doshi hai. bible dassdi hai: “bure manukh nu os de kamma anusar badla milega.”​—hizkiel 18:20, CL.

 apne to vaddi umar de kise bharosemand viakti naal gall kar ke tuhanu vadiya laggega. bible dassdi hai: “mittra har vele prem karda hai, atey bhra bipta de din layi jammya hai.”​—kahauta 17:17.

 shayad tuhanu lagge ki kise naal gall na karni hi akalmandi hai. chupp rehna ik kandh vang ho sakda hai jo tusi apne aale-duaale kharhi keeti hai taaki tusi hor dukhi na hovo. par zara socho, chupp reh ke tusi jehrri kandh surakhya layi kharhi keeti hai, oh tuhanu doojya to madad lain to vi rok sakdi hai.

 jado jeanette naa di naujavan ne apne naal hoi ashleel chherrkhani bare gall keeti, taa os nu kaafi rahat mili. oh dassdi hai: “mere naal chhoti umar vich ashleel harkata keetiya gaiya san te ashleel harkata vale aadmi nu mai jaandi si te os te bharosa kardi si. mai kinne saal kise nu dassya hi nahi. par ik din mai sara kujh apni mummy nu dass ditta te mainu idda lagga jidda mere modhya to bhaari bojh uttar gaya hove.”

 apne tajarbe to jeanette samajh saki ki shayad kujh lok apne naal hoi ashleel chherrkhani bare gall karan to kyo jhijakde han. oh dassdi hai: “ashleel chherrkhani bare gall karni takleefdeh hai. par mere mamle vich, gall na karan karke mere layi jeeuna mushkal si. mere layi vadiya si ki mai jaldi to jaldi kise naal is bare gall karaa.”

 ashleel chherrkhani karke tusi shayad apne bare galat rai kaiyam kar lavo, jive tusi kise da pyaar paaun ja kise nu pyaar karan de layak nahi rahe, tusi bilkul nikamme ho ja tusi sirf doojya di havas poori karan layi hi jeeunde ho. par hun tuhade kol ihna jhoothiya galla vicho nikal aaun atey change hon da sama hai. (updeshak di pothi 3:3) kehrriya galla tuhadi madad kar sakdiya han?

 bible da adhiyen. bible vich rab de vichaar han jo “shaktishali . . . kilya varge mazboot vichara nu dhaah sakde” han. ihna vich oh jhoothiya galla vi shamal han jo tusi apne bare sochde ho. (2 kurinthiya 10:4, 5) misal layi, agge ditte havalya nu parho atey ohna te soch-vichaar karo: yasayah 41:10; yirmiyah 31:3; malaki 3:16, 17; luka 12:6, 7; 1 yuhanna 3:19, 20.

 prarthna. jado tusi apne aap nu nikamme ja doshi mehsoos karo, taa prarthna vich “apna bhaar yahovah utte sutt” dyo. (zaboora di pothi 55:22) tusi kade vi ikkale nahi ho!

 mandli de bazurg. ihna masihi bhrava nu sikhlayi ditti jandi hai ki eh ‘harek paun to lukkan de tha jehe te vachharr to ot’ jehe hon. (yasayah 32:2) eh tuhadi apne bare sahi nazria rakhan atey zindagi vich agge vadhan vich tuhadi madad kar sakde han.

 changi sangat. ohna bhena-bhrava nu dekho jo masihiya vajo vadiya misal han. gaur karo ki oh ik-doosre naal kive pesh aaunde han. same de beetan naal tuhanu ehsas hovega ki sare lok apne adhikar da galat istemal karke ohna naal ashleel harkata nahi karde jinha nu oh pyaar karde han.

 tania naa di naujavan ne ehi dekhya. bachpan to hi os nu kayi aadmiya ne apni havas da shikar banaya. oh dassdi hai: “jinha aadmiya nu mai changi tarha jaandi si, ohna ne hi mainu dukh ditta.” par same de beetan naal tania nu ehsas hoya ki is tarha de aadmi vi han jo sacha pyaar karde han. os nu is da ehsas kive hoya?

 tania nu eh ehsas odo hoya jado os ne ajehe pati-patni naal sama bitaya jo masihiya de taur vadiya misal san. oh dassdi hai: “mai os bhra de kamma to dekh saki ki sare aadmi havas da shikar banaun vale nahi hunde. oh apni patni di raakhi karda si jidda yahovah patiya to mang karda hai.” *​—afsiya 5:28, 29.