Wowe n’umwana wawe w’imyaka 4 muhora murwanira ubuyobozi, kandi buri gihe asa n’aho ari we ubwegukana.

• Iyo umubwiye gukora ikintu atabishaka, agutera utwatsi.

• Iyo umubujije gukora ikintu yashakaga, arirakaza.

Ugera aho ukibaza uti “ese byaba biterwa n’imyaka agezemo? Ese nizere ko nakura azabireka?”

Gutoza umwana wawe kumvira birashoboka. Ariko mbere yo kubona uko wabigeraho, reka tubanze dusuzume imwe mu mpamvu ishobora gutuma atumvira.

Umwana wawe akiri uruhinja, inshingano yawe y’ibanze yari iyo kumwitaho. Mbese yagutegekaga icyo ashaka. Yapfaga gutangira kurira ukaza wiruka wahangayitse, ukamuha icyo yifuza. Birumvikana ko ibyo byari ngombwa, kuko umwana w’uruhinja agomba kwitabwaho cyane n’ababyeyi be.

Icyakora nyuma y’amezi menshi umwana yitabwaho atyo, ageraho agatekereza ko ari we mutware w’urugo, ababyeyi bakaba abagaragu be bashinzwe gukora ibyo abategetse. Ubusanzwe, iyo umwana agize imyaka ibiri amenya ko burya yambuwe “ubutware.” Ababyeyi be ntibaba bagikurikiza amategeko ye, ahubwo baba biteze ko ari we ukurikiza ayabo, kandi ibyo birakaza abana cyane. Ni yo mpamvu bamwe bahita batangira kujya biriza, abandi bagasuzugura ababyeyi babo kugira ngo barebe uko babyitwaramo.

Muri ibyo bihe bikomeye, umubyeyi aba agomba gutangira gusohoza inshingano y’ubutware, agatanga ubuyobozi bwumvikana nk’uko umwana aba abimwitezeho. None se byagenda bite mu gihe umwana yanze ubwo buyobozi, nk’uko byavuzwe mu nkuru twahereyeho?

Jya ufata iya mbere. Umwana wawe azemera ko umuyobora ari uko abonye ko ufata iya mbere. Ni yo mpamvu ugomba gukoresha ubutware bwawe mu buryo bushyize mu gaciro. Mu myaka mirongo ishize, abantu biyita impuguke  batumye “ubutware” bw’ababyeyi bufatwa nk’aho ari igitugu. Hari umwe muri bo wavuze ko ubutware bwa kibyeyi “budakwiriye” kandi ko “bunyuranye n’amahame agenga umuco.” Ariko nanone iyo abana barezwe bajeyi, bishobora gutuma batamenya ibyo basabwa, bakigira ibyigenge kandi bakumva ko ari bo bafite ijambo. Bituma batabasha kwitegura kuzagira icyo bageraho bamaze kuba bakuru.—Ihame rya Bibiliya: Imigani 29:15.

Jya utanga igihano. Hari inkoranyamagambo ivuga ko guhana umuntu ari “ukumutoza kumvira cyangwa kumenya kwifata, akenshi agashyirirwaho amategeko, yayarengaho agahanwa.” Birumvikana ariko ko igihano cyagombye kuba gishyize mu gaciro kandi kitarangwa n’ubugome. Ku rundi ruhande cyagombye kuba gisobanutse kandi gifitiye umwana akamaro, ku buryo kimufasha kwisubiraho.—Ihame rya Bibiliya: Imigani 23:13.

Jya ushyiraho amahame asobanutse. Hari ababyeyi basaba abana babo kujya babumvira gusa, wenda umubyeyi akaba yabwira umwana we ati “wasukura icyumba cyawe se?” Bashobora kwibwira ko ubwo ari bwo buryo bwiza bwo kurera umwana, ariko ibyo bituma umubyeyi asa nk’aho ari we ugomba kuganduka. Nanone bituma umwana yiha uburenganzira bwo kumvira cyangwa kutumvira akurikije inyungu afite mu byo yasabwe gukora. Aho kugira ngo uhare ubutware bwawe, ujye uha umwana amabwiriza asobanutse agomba gukurikiza.—Ihame rya Bibiliya: 1 Abakorinto 14:9.

Jya ukomera ku mwanzuro wafashe. Niba ugize icyo uhakanira umwana, ntukivuguruze kandi ujye ubyemeranyaho n’uwo mwashakanye. Niba umwana yakoze ikosa akaba agomba guhanwa, ujye umuhana. Ntukamare umwanya munini ushyikirana na we cyangwa ngo wemere ko mujya impaka z’urudaca umusobanurira impamvu wafashe umwanzuro wo kumuhana. “Kureka ‘Yego’ yawe ikaba Yego na ‘Oya’ yawe ikaba Oya, ni byo bizabafasha wowe n’umwana wawe.—Yakobo 5:12.

Jya urangwa n’urukundo. Umuryango ntuyoborwa mu buryo bwa demokarasi cyangwa ngo utegekeshwe igitugu. Ahubwo hagomba gukurikizwa gahunda yashyizweho n’Imana, aho umwana ayoborwa mu rukundo akazagira icyo ageraho amaze kuba mukuru. Nukurikiza iyo gahunda ugahana umwana wawe ubigiranye urukundo, bizamutoza kumvira kandi bitume yumva atuje.