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Statim Nupela Sindaun Bihain Long Divos

Statim Nupela Sindaun Bihain Long Divos

“Mi pilim olsem mi pundaun i go daun long wanpela klif. Ol samting long laip i gutpela, tasol wantu tasol olgeta dispela samting i lus.”—MARK, a divos inap wanpela yia.

“Man bilong mi i slip wantaim wanpela meri i gat wankain krismas olsem pikinini meri bilong mipela. Taim mipela i divos, mi amamas olsem man bilong mi i no inap kros pait moa long mi, tasol mi pilim sem na mi pilim olsem mi samting nating.”—EMMELINE, divos inap 17 yia.

Sampela i divos na ting ol bai stap gut moa, ol narapela i laik stap yet long marit bilong ol, tasol ol i no inap mekim poroman marit bilong ol i stap yet long dispela marit. Tasol klostu olgeta husat i divos i painimaut olsem sindaun bilong ol bihain long divos i hatwok moa long samting ol i bin ting long en. Sapos yu divos i no longtaim i go pinis, ating yu pilim bikpela bel hevi long dispela winim ol narapela hevi i bin kamap long yu. Olsem na i gutpela long skelim sampela gutpela tok bilong Baibel we inap helpim yu long karim na winim ol hevi bilong divos.

HEVI 1: BEL HEVI.

Hevi bilong mani, wok bilong lukautim ol pikinini, na pasin bilong stap wanpis inap putim presa long yu na daunim yu tru, na ol dispela presa i no save pinis hariap. Wanpela savemeri i dai pinis, em Judith Wallerstein, em i bin painimaut olsem ol yia bihain long divos, sampela i save bel hevi yet olsem poroman marit i no stap gut long ol na i lusim ol, dispela i mekim na ol i pilim olsem “laip i no fea, i gat planti hevi, na ol i stap wanpis.”

SAMTING YU KEN MEKIM

  • Krai sori long samting yu lusim. Ating bai yu misim poroman na yu laikim em yet. Maski marit bilong yu i bin gat hevi, ating bai yu krai sori olsem marit bilong yu i no gat amamas, em samting yu gat laik long en. (Sindaun 5:18) No ken sem long makim “taim bilong krai.”—Saveman 3:1, 4.

  • Abrusim pasin bilong stap wanpis. Yu nidim sampela taim bilong stap wanpis na krai sori, tasol em i no gutpela long stap wanpis longpela taim. (Sindaun 18:1) Stori long ol gutpela samting taim yu stap wantaim ol pren, bikos pasin bilong komplein oltaim long poroman marit bilong yu, maski i gat as na yu mekim, dispela inap subim ol pren i go longwe long yu. Sapos yu mas mekim wanpela bikpela disisen bihain tasol long yu divos, orait kisim helpim long wanpela pren em yu trastim.

  • Lukautim helt bilong yu. Planti taim ol presa bilong divos inap kamapim ol sik olsem hai blut presa o strongpela het pen. Olsem na kaikai gut, eksasais, na kisim gutpela slip.—Efesus 5:29.

  • Rausim ol samting we inap kirapim yu long belhat long olpela poroman bilong yu o ol samting yu no nidim, tasol lukautim gut ol divos pepa na ol narapela pepa olsem. Sapos ol samting olsem weding piksa i mekim yu bel hevi, orait putim ol i go insait long boks na larim i stap bilong ol pikinini bilong yu.

  • Wok strong long daunim bel hevi. Olga, husat i divosim man bilong em bihain long man i mekim pasin adaltri, i tok: “Mi wok long askim mi yet, ‘Dispela meri i gat wanem samting em mi nogat?’” Bihain, Olga i luksave olsem pasin bilong tingim tingim kain bel hevi olsem inap mekim ‘tingting i bagarap.’—Sindaun 18:14.

    Planti manmeri i pilim olsem taim ol i raitim ol samting ol i tingting long en, dispela i helpim ol long luksave na kontrolim tingting bilong ol. Sapos yu mekim olsem, traim long tingim wanpela nupela samting we i gutpela na inap daunim dispela olpela tingting kranki yu bin gat. (Efesus 4:23) Tingim tupela eksampel:

    Olpela: Em asua bilong mi na poroman marit bilong mi i no stap gut long mi.

    Nupela: Ol pasin kranki bilong mi i no givim rait long poroman marit bilong mi long paul raun wantaim narapela.

    Olpela: Mi westim laip bilong mi wantaim wanpela rong man.

    Nupela: Bai mi amamas moa sapos mi tingim ol samting bai kamap bihain, na mi no ken tingim ol samting bilong bipo.

  • No ken tingim ol tok i bagarapim bel. Ating sampela pren o wanblut bai mekim ol tok we i no stret o i bagarapim bel bilong yu, olsem: ‘Em i no wanpela gutpela poroman,’ o ‘God i heitim divos.’ b Em as na Baibel i tok: “Yu no ken harim olgeta toktok bilong ol manmeri.” (Saveman 7:21) Martina, em i divos inap 2-pela yia, i tok: “Mi no laik tingim tingim ol tok i bagarapim bel, mi laik tingim ol samting olsem God i tingim. Tingting bilong God i winim tru tingting bilong yumi ol man.”—Aisaia 55:8, 9.

  • Beten long God. God i kirapim olgeta wokman bilong em long ol “i mas putim olgeta hevi bilong [ol] long han bilong em.”—1 Pita 5:7.

TRAIM MEKIM OLSEM: Raitim ol ves bilong Baibel we inap helpim yu, na putim long ol hap em yu ken lukim planti taim. Mipela i kamapim pinis sampela ves bilong Baibel, tasol hia em sampela narapela ves we planti manmeri husat i bin divos i kisim helpim long en: Song 27:10; 34:18; Aisaia 41:10; na Rom 8:38, 39.

Larim Tok Bilong God i strongim yu long taim nogut

HEVI 2: PASIN YU MEKIM LONG OLPELA POROMAN MARIT.

Juliana, husat i marit inap 11-pela yia, i tok: “Mi wok long askim man bilong mi planti taim long mipela i no ken divos. Tasol bihain long em i lusim mi, mi belhat tru long em na nupela meri bilong em.” Planti husat i divos i save belhat long poroman marit bilong ol inap planti yia. Tasol planti taim ol i mas subim ol yet long toktok wantaim, na moa yet sapos ol i gat ol pikinini.

SAMTING YU KEN MEKIM

  • Mekim gutpela pasin long olpela poroman marit bilong yu. Toktok long ol bikpela samting na mekim tok i sotpela na i stret. Planti i luksave olsem taim ol i mekim olsem, ol i stap bel isi.—Rom 12:18.

  • No ken mekim ol tok i bagarapim bel. Moa yet taim yu pilim olsem narapela i sutim tok long yu, bihainim dispela tok bilong Baibel olsem: “Man i gat planti save, em i no save toktok planti.” (Sindaun 17:27) Sapos yu lukim olsem yu kirap kros na yu no inap bosim yu yet, orait tokim poroman olsem: “Bai mi tingting gut long samting yu tok long en na toktok wantaim yu bihain.”

  • Seperetim ol samting bilong yu long olpela poroman bilong yu, em ol samting bilong kot, mani, na ol medikal bil samting.

TRAIM MEKIM OLSEM: Neks taim yu toktok wantaim olpela poroman marit, luksave long ol samting i soim olsem yu o poroman i strongim sait o i no redi long senisim tingting. Sapos inap, makim narapela taim bilong toktok o toktok long rot bilong E-meil.—Sindaun 17:14.

HEVI 3: HELPIM PIKININI LONG LAIN LONG NUPELA SINDAUN.

Maria i tingim bek ol samting i kamap bihain tasol long em i divos na i tok: “Laspela pikinini meri bilong mi i save krai olgeta taim na i kirap pispis gen long bet taim em i slip. Na bikpela pikinini meri bilong mi i traim long haitim ol filings bilong em, tasol mi inap luksave long ol senis long em tu.” Sori tru, ating yu pilim olsem yu no gat taim na bel i no gat strong long helpim ol pikinini bilong yu taim ol i nidim yu.

SAMTING YU KEN MEKIM

  • Kirapim ol pikinini bilong yu long toktok wantaim yu long ol filings bilong ol, maski ol i “mekim planti toktok nabaut.”—Jop 6:2, 3.

  • Tingim gut ol wok bilong yupela. Ating yu laik bai wanpela i strongim yu long karim ol hevi bilong yu na ating pikinini bilong yu i redi long mekim olsem, tasol i no stret long askim pikinini bilong yu long karim ol hevi bilong man i bikpela pinis. (1 Korin 13:11) Abrusim pasin bilong kamapim hevi bilong yu long pikinini o yusim em olsem man bilong karim tok namel long yu na olpela poroman bilong yu.

  • Helpim i stap bilong pikinini bilong yu i kamap gutpela moa. Stap long wanpela haus na bihainim wanpela sediul inap helpim yupela, tasol bikpela samting moa em yupela i mas mekim ol samting bilong stap pren bilong God, olsem ritim Baibel wantaim na mekim famili lotu.—Lo 6:6-9.

TRAIM MEKIM OLSEM: Sampela taim long dispela wik, tokim ol pikinini bilong yu olsem yu laikim ol na i no asua bilong ol na yu wantaim poroman bilong yu i divos. Bekim ol askim bilong ol na no ken sutim tok long poroman marit bilong yu.

Yu inap go het wantaim nupela sindaun bihain long divos. Melissa, husat i marit inap 16 yia, i tok: “Taim mi divos, mi tingting, ‘Mi no bin ting laip bilong mi bai kamap olsem.’” Tasol nau em i stap belgut maski wanem samting i kamap long i stap bilong em. Em i tok: “Taim mi lusim pasin bilong traim senisim ol samting i bin kamap bipo, mi stap belgut moa.”

a Mipela i bin senisim sampela nem long dispela stori.

b God i heitim tru pasin bilong giaman na divos nating. Tasol sapos poroman marit bilong wanpela i mekim pasin pamuk, orait God i orait long poroman i no gat asua long em i ken mekim disisen olsem em i laik divos o nogat. (Malakai 2:16; Matyu 19:9) Lukim atikol “The Bible’s Viewpoint—What Kind of Divorcing Does God Hate?” long Awake! bilong Februeri 8, 1994, em ol Witnes Bilong Jehova i wokim.

ASKIM YU YET . . .

  • Olsem wanem? Mi lusim sampela haptaim bilong stap mi yet na krai sori long dispela divos?

  • Olsem wanem mi inap lusim pasin bilong bel hevi long olpela poroman marit bilong mi?