Ngezinye izikhathi abantwabakho bazakwehluleka ukwenza ezinye izinto futhi lokhu kungabadanisa. Ungabancedisa njani ukuthi bangakhalali?

• Okumele ukwazi

• Ongakwenza

 Sonke siyake sehluleke ukwenza okuthile. IBhayibhili lithi “sonke siyaphambanisa.” (UJakhobe 3:2) Labantwana bayaphambanisa. Kodwa ukwehluleka ukwenza abangabe bekufisa kungabanceda bafunde ukungakhalali. Wonke umntwana kumele afunde ukungakhalali. Umama okuthiwa nguLaura uthi: “Mina lomkami sinanzelele ukuthi kungcono kakhulu ukuthi abantwana balungisise lapho abehluleke khona. Bangafunda ukuthi bangenzani nxa izinto zingahambanga ngendlela akade beyikhangelele.”

 Abantwana abanengi abakwazi ukuthi benzeni nxa bengehluleka ukwenza okuthile. Abanye abantwana abakwazi okumele bakwenze nxa behluleke ukwenza okuthile. Ngezinye izikhathi abazali basuka benze umntwana angakunanzeleli ukuthi kulalapho okumele alungisise khona. Ngokwesibonelo, nxa umntwana angafeyila esikolo, abanye abazali bahle basole umbalisi. Nxa umntwana angaxabana lomngane wakhe, abazali bahle basole lowomngane.

 Manje abantwana bazafunda njani ukuvuma ukuthi baphambanisile lokulungisisa amaphutha abo nxa abazali bebalwela ngazo zonke izikhathi?

•   Fundisa abantwabakho ukuthi konke abakwenzayo kulempumela.

   IBhayibhili lithi: “Loba yini umuntu ayihlanyelayo uzavuna yona futhi.”—KwabaseGalathiya 6:7.

   Konke esikwenzayo kulempumela. Ngokwesibonelo, nxa singabulala okuthile, kuzamele sikhiphe imali ukuze kulungiswe. Lamaphutha onke esiwenzayo alempumela. Abantwana kumele bakwazi ukuthi konke abakwenzayo kulempumela, yikho nxa bephambanisile kumele bazimisele ukuvuma amaphutha abo. Nxa umntanakho ephambanisile, ungasoli abanye kumbe umlwele. Kodwa yekela bafunde kwabakuphambanisileyo kusiya ngokuthi badala okungakanani. Kumele kumcacele umntwana ukuthi akuphambanisileyo yikho okwenze kwaba lempumela emibi.

•   Ncedisa abantwabakho ukulungisa abakuphambanisileyo.

   Isimiso esiseBhayibhilini: “Angaze awe kakhombisa umuntu olungileyo uyavuka futhi.”—IZaga 24:16.

   Ukwehluleka ukwenza okuthile kubuhlungu kodwa akutsho ukuthi ngeke ulungisise. Nceda abantwabakho babone ukuthi bangenzani kulokuthi bakhalale bezitshela ukuthi baqiliwe. Ngokwesibonelo, nxa umntanakho angafeyila esikolo, mncede abone ukuqakatheka kokubala izingwalo zesikolo lokuthi ukusebenza nzima kungamnceda apase ngesikhathi esizayo. (IZaga 20:4) Nxa umntanakho angaxabana lomngane wakhe, mncede abone ukuthi ukuyaxolisa kuyanceda lanxa kungayisuye ophambanisileyo.—KwabaseRoma 12:18; 2 KuThimothi 2:24.

•   Fundisa umntanakho ukuthobeka.

   Isimiso esiseBhayibhilini: “Ngitshela wonke umuntu phakathi kwenu ukuthi angacabangi ukuthi ungcono kulalokho ayikho khona.”—KwabaseRoma 12:3.

   Ukutshela umntanakho ukuthi akulamuntu omedlulayo kuloba yikuphi kakusiloqiniso futhi akumncedi. Phela labantwana abakhaliphileyo ezifundweni kabasoze bahlale bepasa sonke isikhathi. Kanti njalo labantwana abazintshantshu kwezemidlalo kabasoze bahlale benqoba. Abantwana abathobekileyo bayenelisa ukungakhalali lanxa bengakhutha ugatsha ngezinye izikhathi.

   IBhayibhili lithi ubunzima busenza sibe lamandla futhi busincede lokuthi siqinisele. (UJakhobe 1:2-4) Lanxa ukwehluleka kanye lokuphambanisa kudanisa, nceda abantwabakho ukuthi bangakhalali.

   Kuthatha isikhathi ukufundisa umntwana loba yini, yikho lawe zinike isikhathi sokubafundisa ukungakhalali. Kodwa kuzabanceda kakhulu nxa sebeleminyaka engu-13 kusiya ku-19. Ibhuku elithi Letting Go With Love and Confidence lithi: “Kukalutshwana ukuthi abantwana abenelisa ukulwisana lezinhlupho benze izinto abazazisola ngazo futhi bayenelisa ukuvumelana lezimo”. Ukuqinisela nxa bephakathi kobunzima kuzabanceda lanxa sebebadala.

 Icebo: Woba yisibonelo. Ungakhohlwa ukuthi abantwabakho bazalingisela lokho ojayele ukukwenza nxa izinto zingasahambanga ngendlela obuyifuna.